A New World – Ego is the Ruler, Our Sensations are the follower where innocence and love are only in movies

One of my friend celebrated his birthday few days before had a little late party till 5 am . He gave a surprise party the same night surprising everyone with 15 bottles of bear , 20 packets cigarettes and freshly prepared “charas and gaanja dunno exactly ” .They were full on with beer , wine and the non -stop smoking while some even went a step ahead and tried “charas” some tried 1st time . I got to know all this when suddenly a quarrel broke out and loud abusive words woke me up . And this time victim had no right to offend himself because he was beaten up when he was drunk . Which in a college no big case to filed case against.
I once happened to ask one of my colleague what’s the pleasure he discovers when he is in the famous state of “going hangover” and ” its ultimate ashish , you lose yourself , you lose your pain , weight and everything you feel is simply ultimate” which I really found so so funny. And when I was in the process of giving a second thought to this wine or beer I reminded my happiest moments and soon I recollected lots of those and some of them was few hours ago only . And to my surprise I found most of the reasons were simply and nothing and to maximum to the joy of drinking bournvita when I used to offend milk. And there was no wine to the far extent. And what struck to me was if I am already finding so many happy moments when I am conscious then why trying to dig joy even in subconscious state.
( really sorry for misguiding from the topic but that’s I am , sometime I even don’t know where I am leading and still its not wine affect)
And then I realized something “we always try to fill our empty spaces and materials simply add to our empty spaces ” . So what I found after asking so many of my friends actually they started drinking or smoking or any such activities because some other did it. And when they started it was liked by their physical sensation and soon it got stuck to their ego from then its simply ego ruling and sensation following. I am still not offending drinking or sort of but simply drinking to lose sensation and feel the ultimate seems so fake. Its simply cheating ourselves and losing our true-self called innocence. And slowly these habits become ego-balloons making them almost resistant to everything.

This is just one example , likewise there are so so many cases where we are simply trying to do everything or anything which only few do or which gives us fame or so many. And hence igniting so many negative traits like jealousy , fake to ourselves , negative , egoistic , untrustworthy , losing love , emotionless and lot of those. Amid these all we lose ourselves. We rarely talk to ourselves and try to understand the real need real matter lying inside us.
And I know all those who are in this new world including me will rarely grasp it as I know every word of it will shoot their ego-balloon.
End on this note
Hope that day comes when we do everything we love and love with purest of our innocence. That wont be the state of nirvana but it will be drinking yet loving , trendy yet respecting , competitive yet no jealousy.

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About ashishhawking

I am trying to search about myself trying to know me and trying to find something someone for which / whom i shall die loving..............but one thing remains same i can smile and mind u laugh really hard times at times..............so wierdly

Posted on October 30, 2011, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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